What do I do now?
Posted: Monday, May 19, 2008
by Jacqui Byrne
Peter J Jackson
When someone close to you passes away, it is very emotionally draining and not always easy to think clearly. Remember you do not have to rush into your funeral arrangements. The following will help you prepare for the Funeral:
1.Contact family and friend, your minister of religion or someone you feel will offer you support. Share your grief. Talk about the person who has died. You don't have to be strong for everyone else.
3.The Funeral Arranger will ask you for information required for the registration of the death. The arranger will then discuss the type of funeral you would like.
You will be asked the following questions about the deceased
(a)Full name, address, occupation and religion
(b)Date and place of birth
(c)Years of residence in Australian States
(d)Fathers full name and occupation
(e)Mothers full name, maiden surname and occupation
(f)Place, date, and full name of spouse for ALL marriages
(g)Full name and ages of ALL children (living and deceased)
Type of Service
(a)Would you prefer Burial or Cremation?
(b)Would you like a service in a church or at the graveside.
(c)Would you like a religious or non religious service
The arrangers will book a time and day for the funeral that is suitable for you.
Please remember you do NOT have to rush into your arrangements. Grief will not disappear once the funeral is over. The funeral is a very important part of your grieving, it is better to plan it well and make sure the arrangements meet you and your family's needs.
How to say goodbye and the importance of the funeral ceremony
There are four basic needs fulfilled by the funeral:
Emotional- a funeral allows us to "let go" of our emotions and face the reality of death. It allows family and friends to share memories of a loved one, to laugh and cry together and provide vital support for each others grief.
Physical - the disposal of the deceased's body is controlled by State laws, and is usually by way of burial or cremation.
Social - a funeral is a social event that emphasizes and acknowledges life. It is also an historical event that should be shared, so that family and friends can support each other.
Spiritual - a funeral helps us realise that material things don't really matter as money can't buy the most precious gift of all, that of life. A funeral gives expression to love and allows faith to be shown.
The following aspects meet those needs:
Individual choice of funeral makes the event more meaningful for those attending. Families are encouraged to select their own venue, their own music, readings or poetry, and they can choose whether a religious or non religious ceremony is more appropriate. The order, content and style of service can be varied to suit the family's needs. A personal tribute from a friend or family member, or perhaps including appropriate cultural traditions, may make the service more meaningful.
The involvement of the body of the person we are mourning in the funeral experience is very important in helping us through our grief. It is painful to witness the final committal of the body, but the act of that person leaving us helps us to accept the reality of their death. A funeral is for those who are living. it is a celebration of the life of the loved one, not the death.
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Top-level comments on this article: (1 total)hi jacqui, thanks for sharing some useful information, when the time presents itself. it's good to have some idea of what may happen. best regards, sue thomThank for your comments Sue, It's hard enough to think clearly when the time arrives so being prepared, especially if details are written down makes that step a little easier.
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